Seeding your wishes on the New Moon

Geranium Seed

Last week I discovered geraniums have these really cool TWIRLY seeds. This is a geranium I moved inside over the winter. The petals make a pink mess around the plant, dropping petal confetti all over. I was sweeping up and I saw this seed shimmering in the sunlight. It looks as if it is ready to dance and spin right into the ground and grow into a new plant.

Today is the Aries New Moon. A seed is a wonderful symbol for this day. Traditionally, Aries is the first sign on an astrological wheel. Aries begins the new year in spring. And this new moon is the perfect time to plant your seed wishes for the next month and even the next year. It's a sign of new beginnings and going after what YOU want.

Aries is about going with your impulses. It's bold, courageous, and self directed. A sign to embody your authentic self and twirl right out there!

I know this new moon falls into my 6th house in my astrological chart. The 6th house is the area in one's chart that explores work, self improvement, health. It is a house about one's daily routine and self discipline. This new moon landed conjunct with my natal Saturn - so that tells me that now is a good time to create structures and persistent work.

I am wishing for:

daily creative dawdling action

writing practice

making stuff

developing the skills of a creative dawdler, dabbler, and explorer

maintaining my exercise habit and continually exploring new skills in movement

choosing and taking action! (even if it is just a small BOLD step)

improving my working environment, purging stuff I don't need anymore and using up what I have. Not saving it all for later or someday.

I want to pursue - Go! Jump right into the current moment of creating. Clear through the accumulated projects and get to a fresh new page.

I wish to track my routines. I want to be self reliable, trustworthy to myself, more consistent in my pursuit of my creative explorations.

This is what I wish on this new moon. Now I may go collage a dream board.....at least in the spirit of impulses I am going to go sift through some imagery and maybe a vision board will happen.

What do you want, wish for, desire on this New Moon?

Moving a library is a pain in the side....

I am home today. Feeling very calm because I have a pain in my front left side. It came on suddenly last night while I was sitting on the couch. I think it is a spasm or a muscle strain of my oblique on that side. I did some new core abdominal exercises on Sunday. They were challenging, but I was fine until last night. Spending 4 hours yesterday moving books might have something to do with it.

Why is it that our bodies get these sudden pains at the oddest times? It wasn't during my work at the library...no, I was sitting on the couch and suddenly I got a stitch in my side. I had to stand up and try to shimmy the cramp away. It felt just like the side pains I'd get in elementary school when the PE coach would make us run laps around the school yard. Anyway, it hasn't gone away which has lead me to believe I just strained it. Hurts to breathe deep but I keep trying because that's what I do when I'm in pain....breathe deep. I took some ibuprofen and that has given some relief. Enough that I am able to enjoy being calm.

Moving a library is no small task. The library I volunteer with is moving into a nice new building in about a week and a half. In preparation for moving the collection, I was helping to get some books interfiled together. When the library reopens in it's new digs, the fiction books will all be together. Up to this point they have been shelved together but separated into different genres. Mystery, science fiction, fiction, romance, etc..... Getting all these books alphabetized and together is no small task. We have all these space constraints for packing. In order to alphabetize multiple sections together we need shelf space we do not have in the old building....so that meant moving the same books more than once. It also meant a need to hold three sets of alphabets in my head at the same time. A lot of this interfiling work will just have to take place in the new building end after the collection is moved.

This library is staffed, run, created by all volunteers. No one is paid. The cat who patrolled for mice was paid with cat food. The cat has gone into retirement - lucky cat. She won't be needed at the new building and the only thing cats are good at in moving is being under foot. All of us volunteers, with thankfully, some help from the larger community, will be moving this library. It's work......frazzling work.

At the same time as it is tiring, I am very excited to be a part of it all. I volunteered with this library because I love libraries. Even though my brain hurt yesterday from alphabetizing three sections together I love the puzzle of it. What I have discovered in working with this library, is that I really enjoy certain library jobs. I like the puzzle. I love getting information into a format or system that allows people to find it. I love helping patrons. For a creative dawdler it is a great environment to stimulate the brain.

Now, I just pray my body will hold up. I dread the work of moving....but my brain itches to get the puzzle back together.

Lost my creative dawdler

On the 18th of January I partially wrote a post, which I never finished and posted. Partly that was due to being interrupted and also my own willingness to be interrupted. January just got completely away from me and my intentions. I sit here today kind of lost. Where was I?

A creative dawdler has to learn to start. To practice starting and even restarting. You see - there will always be interruptions or obstacles or committees.

Do you mind if I tell you a little about what happened to me? See January started off with great enthusiasm. I had a word and focus and a strong desire to get back to my blog and do some other creative things.

First I found out that my shoulder/arm pain was not a torn rotator cuff. Thankful for that. Then I found out a volunteer committee I'm on had come back to life. Then I realized - oh if I'm going to get rid of and hand off my secretary treasurer job for my homeowner's association to the next person I must do a lot work between now and February 1. That first week of January the dominoes started lining up.

Well, then I started physical therapy to help with my shoulder/arm pain. Of course I do NOT live anywhere close to the place so factor in a bunch of extra commuting time. Then it dawns on me that I have to make my schedule possible for accommodating the sudden classes for this volunteer committee that's been resurrected. Okay, no problem I make sure I can do physical therapy and attend these classes and move the cat vet appointment a week ahead.

Notice my creative dawdling time is rapidly disappearing. Then the dominoes all started to fall last week. I started the week with an appointment that had been made in November 09 (wasn't going to try to change that one since this appointment was the first available). I did hours of sec/treas work. Went to physical therapy (which at this point as they added exercises with my improvement it meant I was there longer and longer). The cat's appointment that had been moved ended up in this week. I was going from one task to another and all the details for the homeowner's sec/treas job and the details of this resurrected committee were making me feel as if my life had been swallowed. It had. My stress increased as I had less recovery time. My creative life, which is what I consider is my life, was no where to be found.

So this week I am saying, "Now where was I?" What was my intention at the beginning of the year? Oh yeah, "I choose......" was my theme. I was choosing to become a more productive creative dawdler and to attend to my creative projects. I was going to explore tracking my creative dawdling. Well, one month down and I can say I did very little creative dawdling in January.

This is an opportunity to explore. It seems not okay to say "no I cannot be on that committee anymore because that would take away from my creative dawdling time" I wanted and needed to get my shoulder better. I'd waited two and a half months for that physical therapy. I made the mistake of not recognizing the amount of time I needed to close out my work and train my sec/treasurer replacement. What I had a real choice about last month was this committee. And I just went along. I just said well I agreed to be on the committee last year - then it got shelved. Yet, here it is. Now is the time for it, and I'll make time.

And I admit I didn't choose. I was too embarrassed to say, no I cannot do this now. I really want to help this organization. I thought this is a temporary tightness in my schedule. And it is and was. Except, I feel really sad this week. I just completely abandoned my creative life. Gone. I'll never get that time back.

This week I'm still a volunteer with this organization and I wear a few hats there. I'm still on this committee. I believe it won't interfere too much in the future with my creative dawdling time, but there is a part of me that worries it will because of what happened last month. My physical therapy is going to start winding down. Thankfully, I'm much much better. I did all the work for the sec/treas job and gave it over. There are a few details, but I'm done with the job. So now I have the chance to get back to something creative.

I think this blog of mine is about practicing this muscle that says "No, I cannot do this because I must tend to my creative dawdler." How do you say no to things you care about but are less important than your creative life? Why do we in this culture minimize creativity? It seems only important if you are a bestselling author or painter or musician? I do not really believe that. I believe creativity is just as important to human beings as breathing, loving, eating, etc.... But it still feels wrong sometimes to put my need for creative puttering time ahead of the requests of people I care about.

I am proud of myself for one thing. In the month of January I stayed consistent with my exercise and I cooked meals for my husband and I. I just feel so sorry I neglected my creative life. How do you handle this when your creative life gets swallowed? Do you have any tricks for getting back to it? For starting again?

This is a quick update post........just to say I haven't forgotten about you blog. I created a schedule where I can track how I'm using my time. I'm using my timer for 15 minutes at a time to help me stay on task. I'll be back soon to elaborate on more......

Indulge the heart

Hi there blog........I guess I've been doing too much dawdling and not enough blogging. That is one of the challenges of being a creative dawdler, it is easy to slip into doing a lot of nothing and having nothing to show for it.

Lately, I've been getting the urge to come back. And also the urge to keep track of my creative dawdling. Blogging about it seems like the next action step.

I do believe one can be a creative dawdler and be productive. Though, at first glance, the two seem at odds or opposites of each other. I've spent oh.....15 years if not more, minimizing, hiding, putting down myself as a creative dawdler. When you do that to yourself you become less productive and really not very much fun to be around. See, if they are connected that way..... why wouldn't a little celebrating, expressing, and praising creative dawdling have the opposite effect and make one more productive? In 2010 I'm going to explore this question.

So here's a toast to 2009. Raise up your glass of whatever you are indulging in. Still here. Still creative. Still alive with a beating heart and indulging in another year. Grateful for it.

As I turn the page to 2010. I am going to explore and experiment with tracking my creative dawdling. Come along with me.....I invite you to add your voice to mix.

Parking spots for my creative interests.

A few days ago I took a bath. It's always in the bath that I get such good ideas. The thoughts about my life seems to flow in the bathtub. So here are some notes from the tub:

I reread parts of Barbara Sher's book Refuse to Choose. I'm a scanner. This is a term Sher came up with to describe the types of people who are wired to be interested in many things. She first used the term in her book, I Could Do Anything If Only I Knew What It Was. Later she wrote a whole book, Refuse to Choose, about scanners and the different types of scanners.

So, if you are familiar with the book then I'll say I'm a Sybil Scanner and you'll know what that means. But you don't need to know what that means for our purposes here. The first time I read this book I felt relieved. I was thinking I really needed to pick one of my interests like ceramics or writing and choose ONLY one to focus on turning into a career or something productive.

Now a few years later, I accept that I want and need all of my interests. I keep cycling back to each one. Upon rereading this chapter regarding Sybil scanners I see exactly what I need to do for my sanity and productiveness. I need to set a schedule for myself and my interests.

I'm really good about showing up for my library volunteer work. It has a schedule, and people are expecting me to show up. I'm not so good with my clay work. No one is expecting me to show up and I have no schedule for it.

The problem with this is I let myself down when it comes to my creative interests. I fail to show up and it causing me to not trust myself. I really don't want to continue down this path. I need to schedule and expect myself to show up for myself.

I have a lot of creative interests. I'll name just a few:
clay
making stuff/creative assemblage
journaling
writing
crochet
yoga
beads
soul collage®
reading
libraries

This leads to the other issue I need to address. My interests need parking spots and landing spots, which I'll explain in a moment. Sher suggests making avocation stations for each of your interests. A place designated for each interest. Right now my interests are on top of each other. They are piled and jumbled and disorganized.

If I want to do clay work I may have to spend several hours just getting a space to work.

I know there is a table under here somewhere.............

Say I decide to begin a new crochet project, but where did I leave that size G crochet hook? And while I'm looking for that hook I find.......the clasps!!.....
to make that bracelet that I bought beads for oh so many months ago

..............uh oh, where did I put those beads?!

Do you feel my pain yet...........?

All that stuff I clear off the table mostly are bits and ideas for all my creative interests. And if I go to work on one thing I'm likely to find a whole bunch of other things I want to do. It hits me all at once and the result is I work on nothing while the ideas yammer at me to work on them. No wonder I go running for shadow comforts and time monsters (google Jennifer Louden to find out what those are)

So.........while in the tub, rereading this chapter I came up with a solution and I'm already on my way to sorting it out. I am reorganizing my studio. I am saying yes to all my creative interests. I am storing them in a way that I think is like parking spots.

For instance, soul collage® will have a parking spot. Sized for the space it needs.

My clay, already has a working parking spot, but it needs an empty table....i.e. landing spot.

Beads will have a spot. Writing pages will have a spot. Yarn and room for more yarn will have parking spots. Notebooks for various interests will have a spot to collect ideas.

My goal is to be able to take the stuff out, work with it, and put it away easily in a short period of time. So if I have the urge to create in (fill in the blank)_________ interest it flows from working on it and back to it's parking spot with ease and allows the creative momentum to happen. The landing spot is the table and having room and space to maneuver the stuff in and out onto the table and off (very important!).

Once I get it all sorted and parked. I plan to do a test run and take 5 minutes get it out. Play for 5 minutes and put it away. Then test the next interest. Once I get the stuff in a easy way to use, then I'll work on my schedule.......ah, that may be more challenging.

I may be a creative dawdler, putterer, or scanner - but I refuse to let it jam me up and keep me from enjoying the creative flow.

So I'll let you know as I go........

word play

I really need to get some photos in here...........but that's another day...........today is about word play.


When you feel SCARED

take the letters in that word and

rearrange them

until they spell

SACRED

Focus on that. Because what one focuses on expands.

For me dawdling,

dithering,

breathing,

and being are sacred.